Strategies for minimizing quarrel among couples in rural communities of Awka south local government area of Anambra State.
Background of Study
The institution of marriage is as old as mankind. It’s origin could be traced from the first biblical reference to marriage. It describes Adam and Even being brought together by God; forming the first marital union of a man and woman in history. Though marriage appears to be merely a physical union, starting with a wedding ceremony performed by man, it is actually a divine institution created by God (Imo, 2009).
Marriage is a lifelong universal, sacred and highly solemnized human institution. It is the union for life of mature men and women for the procreation of offspring. According to Pimenta (2006), marriage is not limited to the procreation of children; it includes the keeping of a happy home by the married couples through mutual love, tolerance, persuasion and dialogue.
Marriage has been described as a legal union of a man and a woman as husband and wife. It is a relationship in which adults of the opposite sex make emotional and legal commitment to live together. Marriage involves the coming together of a man and woman to raise a family and to meet the satisfaction of security and of an enduring affection and companionship (Omari, 2005).
Wright (2008) noted that marriage is a cooperative venture in which two people are developing oneness and at the same time maintaining and enhancing their own’ life individual and potentially. He also stated that marriage is a journey that involves choosing between numerous paths. Each path has its own characteristics and destination. Some good and some not. It is a journey in which we encounter stages or periods that we might call seasons. When a marriage experiences all the right effects, yielding happiness, it is because right causes have been understood and practiced. But when marriage is filled with problems of every sort, causing great unhappiness, right causes have been either unknown or ignored.
Couple can have exciting, happy and successful marriage only, if they follow God’s prescribed formula Agba (2008). In a marital relationship two people who were formerly strangers to each other become lovers and so come together either for life or at least till the relationship becomes unbearable. No two individuals are identical, no matter low closely they many resemble each other, either physically, emotionally, morally or spiritually.
A marriage works because of the spirit of give and, the spirit of occupation between the couple. Marriage as a social institutions is cherished of the world population Henslin (2004). It is usually contracted amidst joy, happiness and merry making for the couple, family members and friends. Marriage being a social institution fosters the coming together of two totally different individuals with different socio-economic back ground to form a family.
Probably because of these differences, the marriage institution is seen to breed more conflicts than most other social institution. (Esere 2012) citing Alhasan (1988). The need for peaceful coexistence both in the home and in< the society at large cannot be over stressed. Peace is related to most social objectives jike development, justice, progress, freedom, security, fairness and equity. Peace affects practically every aspect of social existence, at different levels, starting from the home to the global relationship (Esere, 2012). Peace exists in the home when the parties involved can manage conflict constructively. This may be possible when a number of conflict resolution skills are acquired and mastered. Melkranzler (2011) noted that marital love requires the ability to put yourself in your partner’s place, to understand that the differences that divide you are the differences of two unique personalities rather than betrayals of your hopes and dreams. He went further to say that the conditional willingness of each couple to understand, and resolve their differences is through he sharing of your deepest feelings.
Concerns, attitudes ;and ideas are fundamental component of marital love. Quarrel is an angry argument or disagreement between two people and it can lead to a fight between two people. Wright (2008) defines quarrel as a verbal strife in which angry emotions are in control and couples do not deal with the issues but instead attack the other person. Quarrel is inherent in every marriage because each of the spouses is different from the other. The forces of division are multiple. It is only by the spirit of cooperation and the pursuit of common interest that they try to keep the union going. If quarrels go unchecked the situation may deteriorate to the extent if becoming imperative that the couples must separate. Children brought up in such home are not given worth while home education. When these children grow to manage their own families, all the bad behaviour they acquired from their parents will manifest in their own families.
Don and Richard (2004) noted that the failure of couples to identify, determine and mutually assign area of competence and responsibility, and determine who is in charge of what is amongst the most destructive omission in marriage. He also stated that couples who resist evaluating their marriage, setting goals and determining the area’s of decision making and roles are usually threatened because they feel insecure and madequate especially in Awka south local government area of Anambra state where quarrels among couples are over whelming.
It is possible that if adequate strategies are employed the rate of quarrels among couples will be reversed, hence the need for the study.
Statement of the Problem
The success of one’s marriage has a serious effect on the relationship within a wide circle of friends, relatives, couples, children and the society. This is why marriage in rural communities should not be seen as something to be toyed with but as something to be nurtured, cherished, and preserved by all means. Over the years, rural communities have witnessed an alarming rate of marital disorganization, loss of affection between couples and cases of marital violence (Imo, 2009).
According to Daily Times Nigeria (2012) the divorce statistics in Nigeria are getting worse by the day and the unofficial number of failed marriages is probably even worse. Due to the rate of divorce, children of these divorcees now become delinquent constituting nuisance to the society. The girls goes into prostitution, why the boys go arrived robbery making the society a difficult place to live in. Mmodum (2005) noted that the choice of marital
partners incorporates much of reality and common sense and must prove to be practical and working partnership or it fails. Efforts have been made by the government, Authors, counselors and non government organization to carry out campaign against quarrels among couples both in rural and urban areas. Despite these efforts the rate of quarrels among couple in Awka south local government continued to increase. Therefore the problem of this study is to find out the strategies for minimizing quarrels among couples in the area. Also the reason for carrying out,this research is to evaluate and identify strategies or measures for minimizing quarrels among couples in rural communities. This will eventually help in reducing divorce rate in the aforementioned local government area.
Purpose of the Study
The main purpose of this study is to find out the strategies for minimizing quarrels among couples in rural communities of Awka south local government area of Anambra State.
The main purpose of the study is to investigate the strategies for minimizing quarrels among couples in rural communities of Awka south local government area of Anambra south specifically the study intend to.
- – To determine the impact of economic empowerment of women in minimizing quarrel among couples.
- To ascertain how mutual respect of couples right minimize quarrel.
- To determine how marital education help in minimizing quarrel among couple.
- To ascertain how reduction of early marriage can minimize quarrel among couples.
Significance of Study
This study is important in Nigeria today because of the ever increasing incidence of quarrels among couples today. It will be beneficial to young married couples as well as their older counterparts. The study to an extent will reduce social vices in the society which comes as a result of broken homes.
A lot will be achieved in bringing sanity in our family for better tomorrow. The research is important because it will resolve factors which enhance quarrels among couple in rural communities. It will also create awareness on married couples and potential couple will be able to minimize the incidence of marital disorganization and bring about harmonious living among couples in rural communities. It will also server as a data bank for researchers who have the intention of expending the scope of this study. Scope of the Study
The study is delimited to finding out the strategies for minimizing quarrels among couples in rural communities of Awka south local government area of Anambra State. It is also delimited to the characteristics, determine the impact of economic empowerment of women, ascertain mutual
respect of couples right, marital education and reduction of early marriage how all this can help in minimizing of married among couples, in rural communities of Awka south local government area of Anambra State. Research Questions
The following research questions were formulated for the study:
- How will economic of women help to minimize quarrel among couples?
- How will mutual respect of couples right help to minimize quarrels?
- How will marital education help to minimize quarrel among couples?
How will reduction of early marriage help to minimize quarrel among couples